As I sit to write this the morning is calm. The kids have been fed, the breakfast is cleaned up, the washer is running and I have utilized the miraculous sedative of PBS to sedate the natives for just 20 minutes so I can sit and write this while savoring my coffee. Future heather will find it very entertaining so for her sake I have to capture it.
An hour ago things were not quite this way--I had already achieved the individual 4/4 crying level (4/4-I) before 8:00am (that means all 4 had cried at some point) and was advancing towards the ever rare level of 4/4 simultaneous crying (4/4-S) by 8:15. Jack was in dire need of a bath and Ben and Grace had reached the 'yellow' level of discipline by 8:30am.
It all started with summer evening laziness. Dinner had ended last night and it was time for Bed. The girls have been earning money doing all sorts of things lately and I have been outsourcing like crazy--you name it--cleaning up dog poop (lydia is the best), picking up walnuts (50 cents per trader joes bag), finding lost objects, extensive cleaning projects--even teaching Ben how to pump on the swing (my patience was gone--might be the best dollar I've spent if they actually succeed). Before judgements are passed that our kids only work for $, they all have their base jobs every day (not Jack--he is still baby godzilla caliber when it comes to projects)--the payment is for stuff over and above their regular 'duties'.
Anyhow, last night Lydia had earned 75 cents with her walnut harvesting and wanted to round it out to a full dollar. She was seeking out other jobs and said 'hey, can i get jack ready for bed?'. Ryan and I looked at each other and shrugged, why not? So while we relaxed another few minutes she did it all including the diaper (which I guess had poop in it that they dealt with) and we did not do a double check (or I should say Ryan didn't as he was on final Jack duty). They (Grace helped a little too) did a really good job and even brushed his teeth, read him a story, got him into bed and tucked him in complete with noisemaker and fan on.
However when Grace went in to get him this morning (I swear they love to do these things and ask to--the morning Jack service is pro bono) she high tailed it out of his room holding her nose and shrieking. Of course the night his diaper was put on by unsupervised 6 year olds he has an epic messy poop that would have likely breeched even the most experienced diaperist's handiwork but on this morning when it was all askew and BACKWARDS the poop was really just everywhere. On his sheets, on his books, on his pjs, up his back, down his legs--you name it-except the hair--that was spared.
Sooooo, my 10 minutes of summer relaxation on the back patio cost me way more than 25 cents--cost me some laundry, a full on bath and a lot of crying(mainly on Jack's part) and a very stinky upstairs for the better part of the morning.
During the great poop clean up Lydia was grumping, crying and rolling around because she had been woken up earlier than desired (which is the scenario every morning) and Ben was in permanent whine/cry mode about who knows what which is how I nearly achieved the 4/4-S. I tried to get Grace to cry about something just to bump me up to the next level but she only faked a little cry and I don't think that actually counts as a valid 4/4-S situation.
Just to round out the morning Ben squirted himself in the eye with orange juice as he was peeling his clementine for breakfast so I had to lay him on the counter squirting contact saline in his eye as he's screamed "My eye will nevvah stop hoowting! It will hoowt forever !" and he thrashed around nearly knocking dishes off the counter that were drying (did I mention our dishwasher is broken?).
So, now we're all good for the moment. No one is crying, screaming or whining. There are no body substances anywhere they aren't supposed to be (as far as I know) and all is right in the world of parenting for the moment.
An hour ago things were not quite this way--I had already achieved the individual 4/4 crying level (4/4-I) before 8:00am (that means all 4 had cried at some point) and was advancing towards the ever rare level of 4/4 simultaneous crying (4/4-S) by 8:15. Jack was in dire need of a bath and Ben and Grace had reached the 'yellow' level of discipline by 8:30am.
It all started with summer evening laziness. Dinner had ended last night and it was time for Bed. The girls have been earning money doing all sorts of things lately and I have been outsourcing like crazy--you name it--cleaning up dog poop (lydia is the best), picking up walnuts (50 cents per trader joes bag), finding lost objects, extensive cleaning projects--even teaching Ben how to pump on the swing (my patience was gone--might be the best dollar I've spent if they actually succeed). Before judgements are passed that our kids only work for $, they all have their base jobs every day (not Jack--he is still baby godzilla caliber when it comes to projects)--the payment is for stuff over and above their regular 'duties'.
Anyhow, last night Lydia had earned 75 cents with her walnut harvesting and wanted to round it out to a full dollar. She was seeking out other jobs and said 'hey, can i get jack ready for bed?'. Ryan and I looked at each other and shrugged, why not? So while we relaxed another few minutes she did it all including the diaper (which I guess had poop in it that they dealt with) and we did not do a double check (or I should say Ryan didn't as he was on final Jack duty). They (Grace helped a little too) did a really good job and even brushed his teeth, read him a story, got him into bed and tucked him in complete with noisemaker and fan on.
However when Grace went in to get him this morning (I swear they love to do these things and ask to--the morning Jack service is pro bono) she high tailed it out of his room holding her nose and shrieking. Of course the night his diaper was put on by unsupervised 6 year olds he has an epic messy poop that would have likely breeched even the most experienced diaperist's handiwork but on this morning when it was all askew and BACKWARDS the poop was really just everywhere. On his sheets, on his books, on his pjs, up his back, down his legs--you name it-except the hair--that was spared.
Sooooo, my 10 minutes of summer relaxation on the back patio cost me way more than 25 cents--cost me some laundry, a full on bath and a lot of crying(mainly on Jack's part) and a very stinky upstairs for the better part of the morning.
During the great poop clean up Lydia was grumping, crying and rolling around because she had been woken up earlier than desired (which is the scenario every morning) and Ben was in permanent whine/cry mode about who knows what which is how I nearly achieved the 4/4-S. I tried to get Grace to cry about something just to bump me up to the next level but she only faked a little cry and I don't think that actually counts as a valid 4/4-S situation.
So, now we're all good for the moment. No one is crying, screaming or whining. There are no body substances anywhere they aren't supposed to be (as far as I know) and all is right in the world of parenting for the moment.
